A period of absence is often needed when you recognize your inability to be fully present. These last few years have crescendoed to a place where I have felt transformation take over my person like never before. These last few months have brought me to a precipice where I've had to meet the new version of myself forged from these storms of life.
They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and, I believe that to be the acknowledgement of how precious our time here on this Earth is and how we are leaving our mark on the world around us. Grief has shown me that these masks we wear and try to maintain, crumble under the pressure of loss and change. We cannot deny the fault lines of our surroundings, nor, the strengths of the bonds we create in sustaining ourselves.
Often, when I feel the pressure of life heating me up, I retreat. I find that I must locate the boundaries of my limitations and check in with my ability to perform in the ways that I expect of myself, and, am surprised to learn how interactions weave the foundations of our own self-expression. I know that change has come for me, but, I've been unsteady in how to present my adaptations to the world. I feel vulnerable, infant, and full of curiosity to where this growth is driving me.
In my years of studying metaphysics and spirituality, I found myself longing for more concrete evidence, more science, more history and better foundations of the application of my magic beyond positive thought alone. This ongoing drive for truth, knowledge, and authentic expression of myself has brought me to the doors of ritual magick. I understand that there is generally a lot of stigma around this kind of work, and, branching off from the free working path of abstract spirituality I want to fine tune my practice and dig deeper into the history of planetary magick, use of the elements, math, and sound to my practice.
I hope you all stick around and follow me on this journey of self-discovery, mysticism, magick, and occult history. I believe to truly follow your intentions, magick, and truth you have to go to some uncomfortable places and I'm ready to embrace this change within myself and see the doors that open up for me beyond this veil.
While adjusting to this mindset shift, you'll likely see some stylistic and branding theme changes as I feel like my creativity needs to burst out of this box I've put myself into and explore some other shades, styles, and expressions of self. I'd love to share more writing, thoughts, planetary understandings, and magical expression with you all.
I hope we're all brave enough to explore the new corners of ourselves that are rising up within us, and, that we're embraced in our expression.